California Divorce and Family Law

Quoted in the USA Today

Who gets custody of the dog is complicated, 'hotly contested'

When couples split up these days, a matter every bit as intense as who keeps the house or plasma TV is increasingly being slammed onto the table for discussion: Who gets the pets?

Joint custody, sole custody with visitation, no ongoing relationship at all or splitting the pets between partners are all up for consideration, as are who pays expenses for the animal (no matter who has custody) and what happens if the custodial caregiver becomes incapacitated or links up with someone who hates dogs.

"There has definitely been an increase in pets as part of the settlement," says attorney Donald Frank, partner in Blank Rome's Manhattan office. In a 2006 survey of lawyers by the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers, 25% reported an increase in pet custody, about 90% of the cases involving dogs.

And it's sometimes a "very hotly contested issue," Frank says.

Most times, divorcing couples decide about pets (regarded as property) fairly early in the settlement process, "often in a series of phone calls between lawyers," Frank says. But sometimes, he says, the matter must be resolved by a judge.

Divorces aren't the only breakups with implications for pets: Live-in relationships that fall apart often prompt animal-care negotiations.

Lorna Doone has two homes

When Amelia Glynn, 35, and her boyfriend broke up last year, she requested shared custody with the pit bull he brought with him into the relationship. The dog "was important enough to me that I wanted to make a joint-custody agreement," Glynn says, so Lorna Doone spends alternating periods with each.

Glynn wrote about the arrangement in her just-launched pet column on SFGate.com, the San Francisco Chronicle's online operation. The piece prompted several readers to write emotionally about similar experiences, including one divorced couple who share custody of their Boston terriers and an unmarried couple who worked out a split-time deal for their Taiwanese dog.

"It's just not weird" to want to continue a relationship with a beloved pet, Glynn says.

But it can be complicated.

In the best case, the couple put aside emotion, resentment and recrimination and "focuses on figuring out what's best for the animal," says Jennifer Keene, author of a new book that offers guidance for doing just that: We Can't Stay Together for the Dogs: Doing What's Best for Your Dog When Your Relationship Breaks Up (T.F.H. Publications).

When Keene, 30, now a dog trainer in Beaverton, Ore., and her husband decided to divorce three years ago, they instantly agreed on arrangements for their two dogs. Keene took Moxee, an Australian cattle dog mix with some behavior problems, and her ex took Sixxy, a pointer mix.

The need for expert advice

Keene's pet-custody resolution was quick and amicable, but she discovered there wasn't much in the way of expert advice about how to navigate the matter properly. So she set out to research and write a step-by-step guide, including training tips for dogs that come unhinged with the changed family dynamics.

Architect Sara Vreed, 31, of Portland, Ore., put those tips to good use recently when she and her long-term boyfriend broke up.

"I knew to be concerned about the transition," Vreed says, because when the couple broke up for a time two years ago, Ivo, her sheltie, showed some classic stress signals — he had behavior problems and loss of fur on his belly. This time, she sought Keene's advice and learned the importance of "sticking to routines and keeping things positive," and, after just a couple of days of acting up, Ivo is calm and cheerful and hasn't had fur loss.

It's not always simple to keep a dog's equilibrium solid in the lead-up to the actual physical separation, or in arrangements after the split. No single approach works for every relationship or for every dog, Keene says. "You've always got to consider the individual characteristics of the dog."

Splitting up two dogs that have lived together isn't right in all situations, Keene says, although it was in hers, because the two dogs were friendly with each other but not really strongly bonded. And whether there's one or several pets, attention must be paid to which partner has the time, energy, interest and schedule to give each animal what it needs.

Because there's no "in the best interest of the dog" standard in law, says lawyer Jeffrey Lalloway of Irvine, Calif., the pet's living arrangements should be discussed rationally.

Do what's best for the pet

Sometimes it's best for the dog to stay with the person who keeps the house where it has lived, but not always, Keene says. Sometimes it's best to have a split-time arrangement so each partner gets some time with the pet, but sometimes it isn't, because some dogs aren't adaptable enough.

Still, experts agree, at the end of a relationship, rational discussion may be in short supply. As Frank points out, "People are very invested in their pets." One or both partners may demand custody simply to antagonize the other, but Frank says it's most often because "this is already an emotional time for them, and the thought of also losing their dog" is painful.

Keene empathizes. But in the end, "if the person who is most heartbroken at the thought of losing the dog is not the one who can, realistically, provide a good environment and life for it, my hope is that person will put aside his or her own desires and do what's best for the dog."

From USA Today.

Divorce, pet style - ‘We Can’t Stay Together for the Dogs’

With Florida having one of the nation’s highest divorce rates, it’s not surprising that pets are part of custody battles all over the place.

Who gets the dog? How do you decide, and what issues should you take into consideration?

A lot of us have known friends going through this situation and sometimes the result has been that the pet loses its home. And that’s not good.

Luckily, if you’re going through that problem now (my heart goes out to you - it’s rotten for everyone), there’s some good advice by someone who’s been there, author Jennifer Keene, writing in “We Can’t Stay Together for the Dogs.”

Just out by TFH books ($22.95), which only publishes books about animals, it’s a well-researched and written book with info on custody issues/arrangements and how to live single again with a dog.

Keene is a Certified Pet Dog Trainer and owns Pup-A-Razzi, a training business in Beaverton, OR. She lives with two dogs and has visitation rights for a third.

“As you decide who your dog will live with, level of commitment to the dog (and his special needs) must factor in significantly,” says Keene in her book.

Think about safe handling, commitment to training (would one of you do that, the other one isn’t interested?) and patience, among other things.

Keene talks about the reaction from family and friends and how to handle it. I don’t think she’s left much out in this book.

It would be a great gift for someone in this touchy situation. And there is good advice for those who think they need to stay together for the dogs. Don’t do that — nobody wins that way — but read this book as you go down that path.

From the Palm Beach Post.

Sudan man forced to 'marry' goat

A Sudanese man has been forced to take a goat as his "wife", after he was caught having sex with the animal.

The goat's owner, Mr Alifi, said he surprised the man with his goat and took him to a council of elders.

They ordered the man, Mr Tombe, to pay a dowry of 15,000 Sudanese dinars ($50) to Mr Alifi.

"We have given him the goat, and as far as we know they are still together," Mr Alifi said.

Mr Alifi, of Hai Malakal in Upper Nile State, told the Juba Post newspaper that he heard a loud noise around midnight on 13 February and immediately rushed outside to find Mr Tombe with his goat.

"When I asked him: 'What are you doing there?', he fell off the back of the goat, so I captured and tied him up."

Mr Alifi then called elders to decide how to deal with the case.

"They said I should not take him to the police, but rather let him pay a dowry for my goat because he used it as his wife," Mr Alifi told the newspaper.

From the BBC.
                   

Dog caught in middle of divorce

Question: I recently got a divorce and we settled everything amicably, from our finances to property. The one thing we are still fighting over is our little dog. She was mine to begin with. I had her before we met, so I feel the dog is mine. However, my ex-wife is planning to sue me over this dog. She has become very attached to the dog and has demanded we share custody of it as if it was a child. I told her that was the stupidest thing I had ever heard and she became very angry. I think it’s just a ploy to still be in my life somehow. I would be hurt if I had to give up the dog, but it’s getting ridiculous. What should I do?

Answer: First off, the dog is yours. If you had the dog before coming into the relationship, then it is yours. I’m not saying your ex-wife doesn’t love the dog as much as you, but if she sues, I can’t imagine she would be awarded the dog. I think it is a lot more than just the dog.

I think you are correct in saying that it is still a ploy to stay in your life. I don’t know your ex-wife, but now that all the finances and property are figured out, it seems this is the last thing she can hold on to stay in your life. Divorces are often messy situations, and I’m sorry you have to go through this.

As advice, I would suggest asking your ex-wife what the real problem is behind this situation. Maybe once you get the underlying problem out in the open, you can get past fighting about the dog. Really, though, there is no fight. The dog is yours.

Another answer: I agree, it’s your dog, and you should have it. But pets become an integral part of life and sharing them after a divorce as you would a child is not as silly as it sounds. If you Google “pets and divorce laws,” you’ll see a number of states grappling with this issue.

Most laws treat pets as property, but some courts have set up parenting plans for pets, which would include custody visits.

I think all pet lovers realize that animals can be much more than property, and that’s why you’re in this position. I’m deducing from your question that the two of you have no children. Childless couples will have more attachment to pets.

If everything was amicable, you and your ex probably didn’t use lawyers, but you may have to get one to take custody of your dog. Not knowing the specifics of your case, I’m not sure whether your wife is using the dog to stay close to you or if she just loves the dog. You can try talking to her, as Lynelle suggests, but it seems like she’s in no mood to communicate with you.

If the dog is important to you, you might have to settle the matter legally. Despite your wife’s attachment to the animal, your attachment goes back before you met her so she would need an extreme argument (such as documented pet abuse) to take the dog from you.

This Q&A from the Herald Bulletin.

'Designer dogs' caught in divorce

The Labradoodles were turned over to animal control after their breeders split.

The Australian Labradoodles once had their curly coats groomed and ate doggie gourmet meals of raw meat, V8 juice and yogurt. The Labrador-poodle hybrids fetched $2,900 each for their breeders, Angela and Derek Cunningham, until the 47 dogs became victims in the couple's divorce.

The Labradoodles were neglected -- their non-shedding coats matted and covered in sandspurs. Packed into outdoor kennels at the breeding ground in Lady Lake, Florida, some dogs suffered heatstroke, some had sores and others drank slimy green water. When Angela Cunningham took control of the dogs late last month, animal-control officials warned her that the dogs' care and living conditions needed dramatic improvement. The next day she sent 30 dogs, worth at least $75,000, to the pound.

In less than two days, every designer dog was adopted for less than $150 -- a financial casualty in a divorce fraught with accusations. "I panicked," Angela Cunningham said as she stopped to swallow tears. "If I had five more days, I would have spread them out across the country. But I was scared."

Court records show Angela Cunningham tried to take out a restraining order and block Derek Cunningham's access to the property where the dogs lived. Another one filed against Derek Cunningham's girlfriend mentioned that the dogs were packed into kennels and were not being groomed. Derek Cunningham, who did not return calls seeking comment, also tried to block Angela Cunningham's access to the dogs. In the end, DerekCunningham was evicted from the property. Angela Cunningham was given access to the dogs again.

She had the dogs for two days before turning them over to animal control. Unaware of the battle behind the scenes, Labradoodle lovers inundated the Lake County Animal Shelter just before Thanksgiving. "I had a woman from Oklahoma or something calling me from a plane," said Rene Segraves, the county's assistant animal-services director. "I said, 'Ma'am, you better turn around and go back. They're gone.' "

The dogs were dirty, underweight and had been neglected, Segraves said. Leslie Kalwara, former secretary for the Cunninghams' business, spread the word to other Labradoodle breeders that Angela Cunningham had turned over a fortune in neglected dogs. Outraged breeders contacted rescue groups. The messages zipped across Labradoodle chat rooms on the Internet. One nonprofit rescue group named the International Doodle Owner's Group Inc. volunteered to adopt them all, but the shelter declined. The national group patrols Web sites and classified ads across the county looking for Labradoodles or Goldendoodles (golden retriever-poodle hybrids), in shelters.

Most dogs IDOG rescues are tossed aside by backyard breeders who tried and failed to capitalize on the hybrid-breed trend. "They're [the Labradoodles] not coming from reputable breeders, until this big fiasco," said IDOG's Rescue Coordinator Jo Cousins, who said she finds Angela Cunningham's decision baffling. "There are so many people who would have stepped in and helped, and she chose to dump them into animal control."

The Labradoodle world regards the Cunninghams as pioneering breeders. The Cunninghams started their first breeding center called Tegan Park in their native country of Australia in 1992. The couple leased a ranch here in 2005 to transfer their Australian operation to Tegan Park USA, providing closer access to other breeders, who paid up to $25,000 for a Tegan Park stud dog.

But after the divorce, even the most expensive of their dogs went to the shelter, where a deadly virus spread. Canine parvovirus infected at least three dogs as they waited for the surgeon to spay or neuter them. One Labradoodle died, and the shelter euthanized another dog that began showing symptoms. New adoptive owners have quarantined at least a half-dozen other Labradoodles. "It's just a tragic end to those poor dogs," said breeder Peggy McElroy who had leased the Lady Lake ranch to the Cunninghams.

During the divorce, McElroy said, she paid a groomer to help clean the dogs, but only a handful received care before Derek Cunningham ushered them off the property. She said she thought Angela Cunningham would restore the business and take care of the neglected dogs. "It's almost like when a mother kills a child," McElroy said. Angela Cunningham said she's still grieving. She kept two of the 17 dogs she did not send to the pound. The rest are staying with breeder friends who promised to give them back when she's ready to start over.

Read the tragic story in the Orlando Sentinel.

Pet disputes in a divorce can be a real dog fight

Gaetano Ferro, a divorce lawyer, remembers an unusual case from a decade ago. It involved a custody dispute over a springer spaniel. What Ferro remembers most are the snickering judges in the courthouse. And he recalls that the couple finally decided the dog would spend alternate weeks with each owner.

Such a case would be less unusual, and probably less funny, today. Nearly a quarter of divorce lawyers surveyed across the U.S. have noticed an increase in pet-custody cases in the past five years, according to a recent poll of 1,500 members of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers. "There is a shift occurring in our society in which the ... pet is considered more a member of the family ... and therefore becomes, sadly, a part of the battle when the family disintegrates," said Joyce Tischler, founding director of the Animal Legal Defense Fund, a nonprofit organization based in Northern California.

A 2004 survey found that 56 percent of pet owners would very likely risk their own lives for their pet, and 53 percent spend more now on their pet than they did three years ago. A 2001 survey by the same group, the American Animal Hospital Association, found that 83 percent of pet owners refer to themselves as their pet's "mom" or "dad."

That relationship is not acknowledged by the courts, where pets are still considered "property," no different from the silverware, the plasma TV and the living-room sofa. "In America, pets are basically chattel," said Monica Harper, a matrimonial lawyer in Hartford, Conn. As a result, many judges find fighting over pets a waste of court time, and attorneys counsel their clients to settle such disputes on their own.

The matrimonial lawyers' survey found that 90 percent of the pet-custody battles were about dogs. To Ferro, disputing who gets the cat or dog is like shooting a mosquito with an elephant gun. But for many divorcing couples, the pet is like their child.

To help judges consider the well-being of animals involved in such cases, the Animal Legal Defense Fund developed a friend-of-the-court brief five years ago. The 18-page brief is intended to show judges that "there is an unnamed third party in a custody case," Tischler said. "There is a distinction in the dog or cat's mind - believe it or not - as to who tends to be closer," she said of the relationship between pet and owners. The brief makes clear that the animal's interests should not be left out in such cases.

Generally, pets stay in the home where children primarily live, said Thomas Colin, chair of the Connecticut Bar Association's Family Law Section. But when the splitting couple does not have children, the issue becomes more complicated. During his first 10 years practicing as a matrimonial lawyer, Colin had never encountered a pet-custody issue. But just last year, he worked on two custody disputes involving dogs. In both cases, the divorcing couples did not have children. "These dogs were so important to these two couples that they stood in the shoes of a child to them," Colin said. "So I treated it that way for them."

Deciding who was granted custody of the pets meant digging up registration certificates, determining who was responsible for taking care of the animals and who had more of an attachment, he said.

Thanks to The Clarion Ledger.