Dear Bubbe,
I have been divorced for 10 years and recently I thought love had given me a second chance. My boyfriend proposed, I said yes, but two months later he also proposed a prenuptial agreement.
Neither of us is wealthy but we have children from first marriages. I gave him back the ring! Now I'm sorry. I Do-Not Miami
Dear I Do-Not,
They say a second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience -- so I hope you can turn this into a good experience!
The timing may have been off but the concept is not. After the proposal and before the invitations are mailed is the time to discuss and draw up a prenuptial.
Young couples on their first go-around usually don't have enough to go around anyway but veterans of the marriage wars should consider a prenuptial agreement if they have children or money and especially if one partner has lots more of either than the other. So give your sweetie a ring (so he'll give you yours back), call the lawyers (yes, one apiece) and figure about $1,000. You can also download forms from the Internet for about $20. Google ``prenup.''
Handle this as soon as possible so no one can claim coercion later; disclose all your assets but no ridiculous demands like who takes out the garbage. He does, of course. Don't forget the deal-breaker talk: children, yes, no and how many; money, how much and who handles it; and religion, yours, mine or ours? And keep one credit card in your own name. (I know. Just do it.)
Bubbe says from the Miami Herald.
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